Downhill at high velocity!

Just to update you on the situation I am really not making a lot of progress. I am going downhill rather rapidly. On the positive front a new hospital bed has arrived and was rapidly installed by a couple of nice chaps. It fits nicely into a corner of my bedroom. It has all the tipping and lifting functions but best of all it has a special air mattress. This is connected to a compressor which chugs along quietly changing the shape of the mattress helping to prevent bed sores and keep me comfortable. It takes a bit of getting used to but overall it is a great improvement.  I usually manage to get into a comfortable position. I don't know how long I've got now but the nurses as they increase the pain relief drugs are careful to leave a well documented trail so I'm not sure if this will be the last message you get from me but I will do my best to post another because you've all been very good readers all around the world. I know that my Redeemer lives and that one day we can all meet up again. This didn't all happen by accident. We have to be part of a bigger plan, and that comforts me. God bless you, Alan Carter. (Typed by Rachel)

I am overwhelmed by all the messages of concern and support

Well I have made it to Sunday 6th December which is a surprise to me as I have felt so poorly. They keep upping the pain relief medication but often the pain wins the competition. Practically every night round about 12 midnight we telephone the district nurse and they come and give me two injections one is to calm me down and the other is to make me want to go to sleep. Around about twenty minutes after this I am dead to the world and then wake up about 6:30 in loads of pain and Rosalind gives me my top up pain relief tablets. Because I can only sleep on my back, other positions hurt too much, we are having a hospital bed delivered hopefully on Monday it will also have one of these special mattresses connected to an air pump that keeps the matress changing shape, hopefully not too energetically.

Please forgive me if I don't respond to your individual messages of support on Facebook I just do not have the energy but I do appreciate the interest and concern that everyone shows. I was so pleased to hear that our good friend Ros Trevor had slipped away in her sleep that would have been a great relief to her and hopefully closure for the family well done Ros.

Thanks to my son Gareth for typing this blog post for me.

Slowly going down hill

It's Sunday 22nd November and I'm lying in bed dictating to my son Gareth who has kindly offered to act as scribe. It's been a good weekend, yesterday I had visits from Jason, Rachel, Naomi and Lorraine. Today my son Gareth has babysat me so that Ros could get to church and he could let the district nurse in to reload my syringe driver. This afternoon I had my brother in law John Miller together with my son Stuart and Steve Faulkner from church visit. Steve came to give me the sacrament which was appreciated. I am finding it increasingly difficult to be out of bed because the change of orientation sets the pain off badly sometimes so much so that I end up vomiting. It's not all doom and gloom I do manage to smile and laugh occasionally. Also we do make a bit of progress yesterday Jason converted an old cardboard box into a blanket cradle to stop the blankets from pressing on my toenails causing bruising. Also my daughter Lorraine brought me a big V shapped pillow which helps support me in a more comfortable position. The district nurses continue to do their very best to support me and help me be comfortable. I still managed to enjoy the programmes on the BBC iPlayer. I particularly enjoy nature programmes and documentaries. Sometimes just for a brief period I am able to forget all my challenges and immerse myself in the programme. I apologise if this has been a boring post but I'm sorry that how it is dying can be a boring process. I just count my blessings that I am not lying in a burnt out basement somewhere waiting for relief that isn't going to come.

It is a real challenge! Sadly not a reel one!

Since coming out of the hospice things have been a bit challenging with  pain and bilious attacks  so much so they have fitted me with the syringe driver again.  This means I get two visits a day from the  district nurses, one to load the syringe and the other to check it is working OK before I go to sleep. Rosalind is a star, as I needed some Oxcynorm in tablet form, she phoned round several pharmacy still she found one at New Addington with a stock. Hurray, it's good to know you have it.

Whilst Ros was out the door bell rang and I managed to get downstairs. It was Seth from church and he had arranged to visit Saturday pm.  We were able to catch up with each other's news till Ros joined us.  Seth brought good news, he had changed his job

Because it is getting quite painful for me to type on the tablet keyboard with my right hand and my left hand shakes a bit I have been experimenting with the voice recognition function. This has led to some hysterical text.  I will try to include some next time.

Back at the Ranch but not riding horses!

Well my spell at the wonderful St Christophers Hospice had to come to an end! Fortunately I did not leave there in a coffin, Rosalind collected me in our car.  What was achieved at SCH whilst I was there?

• I learnt how kind and caring and professional the staff at St Christopher's are and the wonderful resources they have.
• They improved my pain control and taught me more on how to manage it. They progressed me from tablets to syringe driver and finally onto patches.
• Eventually they got me eating most of the time without vomiting. And I learnt to avoid bending low after eating, to put slippers on, if I wanted to keep my stomach contents in my stomach!
• They freed up my internal plumbing so my waste disposal system is working.
• The physio showed me that a very gentle massage can be a pleasant experience and then she showed Rosalind how to do it.

I feel I made a lot of friends there and I was sad to leave them.  They had spoilt me rotten! They gave me 5-star treatment,  Well I ask you where else are you going to get at 3am for free, a top up dose of pain relief medicine followed by one of the following:-

• A cup of Horlics with biscuits or
• A glass of apples juice with biscuits or
• A small tub of ice cream or
• A slice of toast with butter and marmalade

Yes it was like being on cloud nine in heaven or the garden of Eden. 

After a bumpy drive home (I think the local government bodies are letting the roads deteriorate so our friends from Eastern Europe feel more at home), we arrived at No 5!  My first move was to go out the back door to see how the garden was, this turned out to be a bad move! Bending down to put on my gardening shoes set off a bout of vomiting and I fertilised several flower beds! It will be interesting to see what the results are. Maybe I could transform the whole horticultural scene! Anyway I staggered down the garden frightening Eudeen, our next door neighbor, who was putting the finishing touches to the wonderful landscaping she has had done. She kindly offered to get me back to the house but I managed on my own and crawled into bed.

Later that day our friends from the Church's Self-Reliance Centre, the Baxter's came to visit after a horrendous drive out of London. They arrived just in time for dinner, but sadly the smell of the lovely lamb stew set me off retching (that's vomiting when nothing comes up)! So I declined dinner but we did have a wonderful chat. After they had gone I managed to take my pills and to take in an episode of Doc Martin without ejecting anything!

I slept well and woke up in time to take my morning pills, vomit a bit and then have a welcome visit from Kate one of the District Nurses. She was amazing and explained that the vomiting was probably caused by my travelling and being in a different environment. She also explained that the large box of   medicines, syringes and other medical kit I had come home with was "just in case" stuff for use by the District or Hospice Nursing teams. Amazing!

I manage a few sips of soup and a slice of buttered bread for lunch and kept it down, hurray! Then Malcolm Ball and his wife Julie came to visit and I had a wonderful two hours with Malcolm helping me to remember all the people we had worked with and some of the exciting challenges we had overcome!  Tears filled my eyes as Malcolm thanked me for being a positive influence in his work at British Gas and I thanked him for introducing me to Emstar an introduction that helped me grow my consultancy business. Those were the days! I have been very blessed to have worked with some wonderful people.

If you did work with me or you know me and would like to remember some shared experiences and challenges do drop me a line. The best way is an old fashion e mail to ajec@hotmail,com  Facebooks OK but I am not very good at it.

Who has been helping me at St Christopher's!

When thanking people by name there is always the risk that you leave someone out, so let me apologise to those folk for starters. I have not been wearing my glasses, so I have only been able to read names when staff have got quite close (now you ladies know it was not your bosom I was looking at, just your name badge). So here, in no particular order are the stars of St Christophers as seen by me.  However, I must not forget the chefs and their teams in the kitchen, real heroes at producing such excellent cuisine. Then there are wonderful army of volunteers, bless them and last but not lease the professionals social workers, medics and "head shrinkers"! Bless them all.

Anke - the boss, very popular with staff and patients.
Dr Victor - very good and kind

Louis - super woman (such a fast mover)
Sue - the angel of the night (with the hot drinks)

Vee - doesn't like being called Vilma
Maggie - come to help from the Ward upstairs

Marjorie - gentle and kind
Rita - who very kindly asks what I would like for breakfast
Sheryle - great happy singer

Grace - dynamic.  dinner lady

Elaine -- l am the boss, so behave yourself
Christine - a kind and gentle lady 

Dianne - quick like a road runner bird

Debbie - very helpful and kind

Geraldine - happy soul who forgets to wear her name badge!

Esther - nothing is too much trouble!

Kenny - an orderly, orderly very friendly

Geraldine- cleaning expert with a smile

Michelle - a kind person

Colleen - one of 9 siblings, a happy soul!

Angela - the water lady, very dedicated

Katy - very pretty, lovely accent

Sarah - very organised gave me a bath

Susan, helper who takes lunch orders

Jill - where is Jack?

Melrose - proud to be named after a place in Scotland

Joanna - learning the ropes

Dr Debbie - a full on doctor, who rescued me from home 

Kathy - kind and caring

Dr Matt Carey - a man with a mission

St Christophers Hospice: Something to rave about!

Yesterday was wonderful for me and I continue to be astounded by the level of care I receive here. The day started by me having a wonderful jacuzzi bath. The bath was a huge brilliant white structure raised up several feet above the floor. I thought I am never going to jump high enough to get in there! The nurse (I won't mention names, because everyone will be lining up for the same treatment) helped me strip off, and sat me on this special chair. Then she pressed the appropriate controls and I was raised up, swung across and gently lowered into water ar a comfortable 40 degrees Celsius!  Having let me soak in the warmth for a blissful few minutes, she switched the jacuzzis pump on and I was in heaven! She very kindly washed my feet and legs, then my hair and back, amazing!  Then I washed the other bits. She then let me have another relaxing soak before pressing the buttons that lifted me out of the water back to ground zero!  I was glowing with cleanliness and dived into my clean underwear.
Well if that wasn't enough pleasure for one day no sooner was I back in my room than another angel appeared wanting to give me a massage! Rosalind was present but how could I resist, so I enthusiasticly agreed. Oh! She was so gentle rubbing my shoulders, neck and back in a circular motion. She then very kindly showed Rosalind how to do it. Did she realise she was adding a new dimension to our nearly fifty years of married bliss?