Wednesday, 13 May 2015

Fly fisherman has Fun and Games in hospital

A lot has happened to me since my last post nearly a month ago. I had a biopsy operation in St George's  Hospital, Tooting. That was a bit challenging as they got me in quickly and prepared me (I had to fast) and then at 4 pm the surgeon appeared and said sorry but they had run out of time in the theatre and could not operate today.  I was less than happy, as you would expect, but I did understand that when operating they sometimes find things they didn't anticipate so operations can take longer.  So having had dinner I started another fast and they fitted me in the next day 16th April with a right VATS drainage and biopsy. Its called "key hole" surgery but to me afterwards it felt more like "coal hole" surgery (only people of my generation and older will understand the joke).

After the op I think I was on a bit of a high. When the porter pushed me on the bed into the lift (elevator) I got curious looks from a couple already in the lift. I said to them "Isn't this a wonderful hospital?" to which they replied "Yes it certainly is" I then said "Yes, I have just had their first brain transplant and you can't see the scar" in response to which everyone including the porter collapsed in a fit of laughter. 

St Georges put me on morphine for the pain and that upset my plumbing so when I got home (20th April) I could not urinate and was in agony, a lovely male GP (he looked like the Angel Gabriel) visited and referred me to Accident and Emergency (A & E) where a super Scots fly fisherman (we talked fly fishing all the time so I hardly felt a thing) fitted me with a catheter (a tube up my penis) and a bag (24th April). A whole litre of urine came whizzing out, ah relief! They decided to keep me in hospital and I found myself back on my old Heathfield 2 Ward among the friendly docs and nurses.

I had an endoscopy to check my back passage and that proved to be OK, hurrah!  Then Rosalind and I were summoned to a meeting with the Consultants, Docs and a lovely kind specialist nurse and I was given the bad news. I had mesothelioma (lung cancer) caused by exposure to asbestos and I was being referred to the Royal Marsden Specialist Cancer Hospital at Sutton. I was a bit upset and shed a tear.  Rosalind was solid and supportive. 

I then discovered the value of comedians as 2 hours later I was watching Jack Dee on my tablet and laughing my head off! 

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