Thursday, 15 October 2015

Really struggling with the cancer!

Because I was in so much pain at home and kept vomiting everything up the specialist doc from St C's decided to get me in the hospice for a period to try to stabilise me. This was very helpful as it meant the family could go to Helsinki for Stuart and Helianna's wedding on the 10th.
Sadly in spite of strenuous efforts from the medics l have been steadily getting worse. Not eating and drinking has not helped and sadly I am hallucinating. Things came to a head last night when I dreamt there was a bunch of yobs attacking a patient. Apparently I got out of bed and fought with them. I remember getting hit in the face and lying on the floor with some heavy metal on me.  The nurses came to my aid and eventually, aching all over and with a suture over a cut on my nose I was back in bed.
A lot has happened since then. I have been seen by many doctors and a new plan for medication has been worked out.  I have all my painkillers given to me by a thing called a driver.  This spreads the admissions of the drugs over a twelve hour period.  Most of my other anti-sickness medication is given the same way.
90% of the time I feel horrible so much so that Rosalind has been with me most of the day and she plans to stay the night. That is going the extra mile! I am not sure how long I can keep posting so watch this space!


  1. Sending love and prayers to you both, may you be blessed with strength to endure. May God bless you xxxx

  2. Love you Alan and pray for the blessings of heaven to be with you at this difficult time. You remain in our prayers.

  3. Sending love and prayers to you and to Ros. As difficult as it has been for many of us who love and admire you to read this and your previous updates, I know there are many who will benefit from them. Even in your darkest times you are still teaching and reaching out to others. You're a legend!

  4. Alan I hope you see this and that the adjusted doses make things more comfortable for you. In our thoughts - David and Irene Jutton

  5. Much love to you both. XXX